Recent research from the Johns Hopkins Hospital (Baltimore, Maryland) reveals than Spanish dinner may reduce up to the 60% the effects of the “mojo”, especially in young woman aged between 24 and 33. The News Team has visited the hospital and met the team behind these spectacular results.
“This relief in the symptoms, however, was more pronounced when patients were accompanied at dinner by a Spanish citizen”, clarifies M. Walters, head of the New Therapies Division. So much is so that the hospital now has its own set of spaniards whose job is have dinner with the patients. “We store them in a warehouse and feed them once a week, so that they cannot refuse to assist these women in their treatment” -explains R.G. Miller, president of the hospital- “Yes, we have been sued for kidnapping and racism, but we believe that all of this is for a good cause”.
Even though the term “mojo” has several meanings, the new paper published last September on Nature also shows that this therapy is beneficial is most of them. Patients also possessed by evil entities, with too much sex appeal or having technical problems with fax machines have benefited from this new treatment.
“It’s been three months since this bloody machine stop working, but after having dinner with Roberto, now everything is back to normal” – one of the participants in the therapy tells us- “However… this guy seemed like he hadn´t eaten a bite in long time”.
As M. Walters tells us, even the worst results have their bright side: “The only case it didn’t work at all was with the bewitched one… she was transformed into a horse. After three dinners with Eduardo her physical condition didn’t improve, but she decided to compete in races. Now she is a very successful horse”.
The Johns Hopkins Hospital is proud of the quality of its research and now is focused on its new project: helping Eskimos overcome stage fright with tuna salads.